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HMD/OOC CONTACT | THE YEAR APPPLICATION
IC INBOX | THE YEAR TIMELINE

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[If anyone is searching for Ichigo, they'll find him at the Grassy Field, sitting in the middle of it (away from where Clarke was found, of course), staring at the fireflies around him as he looks up into the sky.

He's not doing much of anything, tonight.]

((All comments are screened!))

[Lenka's letter is found on wherever the cat tank decided to sleep, neatly folded.

It reads:]

Lenka,

If you're reading this, then I've died. I probably had enough time to place this somewhere you'd find it, and I already told you I might die earlier this week.

I know you didn't like it - you didn't want to sacrifice me - but in the end, sometimes...you can't get what you want.

[...]

You've probably read my letter by now - you already knew I was a reaper, but not any of the rest of it. I would have told you, but...it's heavy stuff, you know? And I didn't feel like burdening you with my past.

But...I wanted you to know that I'm so happy I got to meet you. You're - the closest thing I've had to a best friend in a long, long time. You remind me of - my best friend, Chad. He was a great guy - kind of quiet - but always there whenever you needed him. You're a lot like him, in a lot of ways - kind, selfless, reliable - and it's helped me a lot to know that you were always looking out for me.

I never...let myself get that close to players in a long time. Even here, most of the people I got attached to were Reapers - but you just kept coming back, and I...

...I'm so grateful, to you. For not giving up on me. For - even if it was just a little while - letting me be someone's friend again, instead of the Reaper that kills them.

..I know...that you'll be able to keep going on. I know that you have the strength to - I've seen it - and I wish you nothing but the best. I already asked you to keep Akira safe, but...I want you to keep yourself safe, and don't join me. Live as long as you can - get your second chance - and make it back to where you come from.

Goodbye, Lenka. Thank you.

[And at the bottom, his signature.]

[Undine's letter is found tucked under a pillow on the bed she chose, after the Trial.]

Hey, Undine.

If you're reading this, then...I've died. I thought this might happen, so...I asked Max for some paper, so I could get everything down.

I just...wanted to say that I was happy I met you. You're a good person - despite the shitty situation you were stuck in - and you've got a really, really big heart. Big in a way that mine used to be, a long time ago.

I hope that you never lose it.

By now, you've probably read my note to the players....and I'm sorry I never told you about any of my past. I remember how you reacted the first week, and, well...

I didn't want to burden you with it when you've already got so much to worry about.

[...]

I know - that you and Akira can make it, no matter what. I believe in you, even if I'm not there to heal you or anyone else anymore, so...that just means you'll have to be more careful, alright? No more fights with things or people that'll mess you up, okay?

I...I know this might sound stupid or...whatever. But...I'm so glad I could protect someone, for just a little bit. I'd...thought that I could never protect anyone again - that all I was good for was killing - but being able to save you from being executed, I...

[There are a few teardrops on the page.]

It made me remember who I used to be, before all of this. The ideals I hung onto - it's in my name. 'Ichi' and 'Go', 'one' and 'protect' - for a long time, I've thought I didn't deserve it anymore.

But last week?

Last week...made me think that maybe, just maybe...that part of my life wasn't completely dead.

...I'll miss you. But keep moving on, alright? Be strong in your own way - a way I've lost. The players - and the reapers - are going to need your strength.

Goodbye.

[And at the bottom, his signature.]

[The note is found on top of Ichigo's belonging, neatly folded.

It reads:]
( Read more... )

[Ichigo seeks out Akira this time, after a week of keeping to himself - His partner might have noticed that Ichigo was making more of an effort to reach out to people this week, to talk to them then he has before.

He's finally starting to live more, to smile more, to trust others again -

But that doesn't take away from what has to happen this week - the weekly murder that Akira's team has to do, and honestly?

He knows it's Akira's turn.

So when he finally pulls Akira aside to talk, it's in the mattress store, in an area away from where most everyone else has claimed beds, to talk about that night.

And the first things out of his mouth?]

Let me help you tonight, Akira.

[A song filters in from somewhere...

Akira will find, once he gets back to the mattress store, a letter sticking out from under the mattress they both used the day before. The feather is tucked inside of it, but perhaps that's not as important as the letter itself, which is...

Ichigo's final thoughts towards his partner.]

If you're reading this, then...I'm dead. I thought this might happen, so I asked Max for some paper and a pen. You've probably already found the note I took with me on my body, however bad it looks - I'm sorry for revealing I was a Reaper, but...no point in lying about it when I've died.

...I don't - have a lot of regrets. No...that's a lie. I have a lot of regrets, but very few about this Game, and how it all ended up. I knew I'd die someday, because I've taken so many lives, but...

Is it selfish of me for wanting a little more time? Just a little. With Undine, Lenka, Mary, Alex...

...And with you.

I don't mind dying. I really don't - my only fear is that instead of being erased, I'll end up back in that crystal, but -

I'm not innocent. I'm not someone who should be mourned over, and I hope you're able to move past my death and keep going. I know you can bring this game to the right ending, and ~~You don't need me-~~

~~I'm not worth it-~~

~~I'm-~~

[There are tearstains on the paper, and the writing devolves into just a line for a moment. There's a bit of a gap, and then...the writing starts again.]

I can't - I can't do this. I can't lie again, not now.

Truth is, I'm...scared. I'm so goddamn scared. I don't - I don't want to die. I might go back to that crystal, I don't know what's going to happen, and I - I-

...It's funny, but I've wanted to die for so long, just staying alive to take down Szayel, and now that the end's coming?

I finally...want to live again.

Because of you.

You - made me feel hope, after such a long time. I felt...like I wasn't just a killer, just someone so empty inside, waiting to die. That I could protect and help others, after everything I've done.

You made me feel love again, after I thought I never would again. Even finding out you were a Reaper just - made me feel a little better, because I hated myself for getting so attached to a player, even after killing so many.

I still - feel like I didn't deserve your kindness, your compassion, your understanding - there's so much I can't repay you for.

I wanted to be by your side in breaking this game. I wanted to stay close to you as much as I could, to support you like how you've supported me, but -

I guess...That's just not my fate after all. See what I mean? Funny.

[The paper is blotched with tearstains at this point.]

...Akira, I love you. I always will, no matter what. No matter what happens, I...I'm so glad, at the end, that I got to meet you. I'm sure - I must have been a big hassle, so...thank you for putting up with me and my stupid love for you for so long.

I-

[The next sentence is scratched out entirely, so much so that it's almost hard to tell what the original sentence was, yet...if Akira looks hard enough, he'll find it.

'I wish that you had loved me back too, but I never deserved it anyway.']

Please - don't forget me. Please - keep being the amazing person you are, full of hope and fight and everything that I've lost.

Because...that's the Akira I love the most - my beloved partner.

Goodbye.

[And at the bottom, his signature.]

[Today...

Had been a hell of a thing. He hadn't expected to get an extra execution and go down a member in the same day, but -

It was almost a blessing. Now, they could go all out - and not worry about what would happen next, or leaks from people they worked with. Now, everything was set - and they only had three more weeks to go.

The time for hiding and trying to kill each other had passed. Now? If they wanted the dead to come back, there was only one option available to them.

To work together, and lead the players to the conclusion the Composer wanted.

Ichigo tells everyone to meet up in the Bookstore, a few hours after the execution and everything has settled down. He's sitting on the couch in there, reading - or trying to read and failing - as everyone shuffles in, looking up whenever someone arrives. And when they're all there?

He takes a breath,and closes his book.]

...So.

Let's talk.

[God. He can't believe it - They did it. They actually fucking managed to pull it off. No one suspected Undine - not even for a moment - and while he got a vote himself, he has an idea of who did it. And it's fine, it's completely fine, they got away with it-

So of course he comes to Akira, in a place when they're both alone - and he doesn't even get out a single word before moving into a full kiss, out of sheer relief that they're both still alive and that they managed to pull off something that, in the past, has been impossible.

They did it. They did it and he's so happy and full of love that he doesn't even think about boundries or anything else, except kissing the one person he's willing to lie and betray for above all else.

Hi, Akira.]

[It's after the investigation, and Ichigo?

Ichigo is bone tired. He's had to talk to people, try to find others with cut hair, all these things -

By the time he's done, he's visibly shaking still, eyes fluttering a bit as he can't go anymore and leans against a wall, sliding down to it on the ground.

Maybe - if he just slept here - just for a little bit -

...Then again, maybe he'll find someone who's kind enough to take him off the street.]

[It's been a long, tiring day - especially for someone so worn out physically from healing Undine earlier. Going through the investigation, hiding evidence, sitting through another meeting with the now demoralized Reapers on his team -

By the time they meet up again, it's late at night, and Ichigo slumps down to take a seat, obviously trembling a little from exhaustion. Before anyone says anything, he takes the piece of Undine's hair out of his pocket, letting it fall to the ground.]

...I...am really goddamned tired.

[This isn't something he's looking forward to, but it's something that has to be done.

Later on in the day, when people have stopped checking out the new places so much, Ichigo goes towards the place with all the weird vending machines in it, leaning against a wall and looking like he's getting ready to hear news that someone he loved has died.

And, well. In a way....

He's quiet for the entire wait, until Alex arrives - and then he pushes off the wall, keeping his head down and his hands tucked into the sleeves of his Shihakusho, off to find Akira and talk to him.

Let's do this.]

[Ichigo has been avoiding Akira in public, following the ruse they've set up - he only once bumps past Akira, still walking fast to where he's going without a word.

However, Akira will find a note in his pocket - and when he opens it up, it reads, in japanese -]

Alex is coming to the meeting, and you'll be recorded. Izaya will probably tag along while invisible. Be careful, and act like how we discussed before. We'll come and find you, so don't worry about going to any specific place.

Stay safe, Akira.

[It's been a long, long weekend. It's one that Izaya has probably watched like the creeper he is, noting that on friday, Ichigo went into the bar and practically never came out - that he's been drinking not for enjoyment, but to knock himself out the quickest - and he's been pointedly ignoring his partner, who he was practically glued to the hip at in the weeks before.

But it takes until Sunday, when Ichigo sobers up enough to finally make his way over to Izaya, looking miserable as he draws the other man into somewhere safe and secure so they can talk.]

Izaya....

[Ichigo presses a hand against his face, swallowing hard.]

I...I think Akira's a Reaper.

[Well. He'd heard about her partner dying, and...he wanted to see how she was after all that, even if she was kind of rude and aggressive. She acted like she cared about him, so...

...Plus, if he lost his own partner, he'd feel absolutely destroyed. So...maybe it's those feelings that make him want to come check in on her.]

Hey, um...How're you doing?

[This said when he manages to find her, in a place slightly away from the crush of the streets so they can talk in private.]

[It's before whatever mission is dropped on their lap that Ichigo goes to find Yusuke - both because he's worried about someone who's one of Akira's close friends (well, worried now that he's sober and not suffering from a hangover), and because of the trial last week.

It may be a break week, but...That doesn't mean that this game is over, and, well...He'd honestly like to get to know Yusuke a little more. He needs to get out and talk to more people - widen his network, so to speak - because, after all, this game is built on the need for trust.

So he approaches Yusuke with a smile - though it's a small one - when they're both somewhere they can talk a bit more privately.]

Hey, Kitagawa. Got a minute?

[God. That trial was....something. Back at the live house, when he's finished talking to people, he flops down on one of the beds, burying his head in his hands and breathing in and out slowly.

All of this - Junko being a reaper, there being seven goddamn reapers- it's enough to make him want to scream, cry, or do both at the same time.

But he doesn't want to do that, so...He'll just stay like this, for the time being. At least, until someone disturbs him.]

[Ichigo thought that he shouldn't leave Assassin alone - not after that outburst at Max before, and especially not after the man lost someone he so cared about.

Because...even though Ichigo can't remember their names or their faces, he knows he's also lost people he cared for - and he knows the horrible, wrenching feeling of knowing they're gone and you'll never see them again, never hear their voices; he also knows the agony of feeling like you failed to protect them, something that still burns deep inside of his own self.

And god, how he hopes that Assassin won't destroy himself with his own grief and loss, like how Ichigo torments himself every single day he wakes up here.

So, once Assassin has calmed down and they're away from the public eye, Ichigo lets him go.]

....I'm sorry.

[It's all he can say.]

[Holy fucking shit.

3 players just died, and a Reaper along with them - the Reaper they'd just found, too. Ichigo doesn't really know what to think about it, and the first thing out of his mouth when everyone's assembled is -]

Looks like the Players are doing our jobs for us.

[In regards to Reaper killing...and also in regards to taking out other Players, as well.]

[So. After everything, they somehow wind up at the theatre - in a room showing that doesn't have anything on, so it's just soundless adverts with chill musiak coming through the speakers. Ichigo goes right along with the chillness that surrounds them, because he is currently high as fuck, and he manages to pull up some of the cup holders so he can lay down on a few chairs, brushing a hand against the carpeted floor while shoving popcorn in his mouth.]

Mrgh - Akiraaaaaa, do you like....ever think about how much stuff this carpet's seen....? It's like...amazing. Movies are amazing because people make, like...all these different kinds and add music and do so many things....and make people feel things....humans are amazing. Aren't they amazing, Akiraaaa?

[Thank you for babysitting this idiot, Akira.]

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Kurosaki Ichigo | 黒崎一護

July 2018

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Kurosaki Ichigo | 黒崎一護

Recent Entries

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CMO POST FOR CAMP PETOSKEY

Week 3 post execution + sunday pc catchall

TO LENKA

TO UNDINE

TO THE PLAYERS

Week 5 - thursday

TO AKIRA

Week 4, post execution - All Reaper Meeting

Week 4, post-trial

Week 4, post investigation

Week 4, Post Investigation

Week four - The meeting

Week 4 - A Quick Note

Week 3 - Sunday

Week 3

Week 3

Week 2, Post-trial

Week 2, post-investigation

Week 2, Emergency post-investigation Detective Meeting

Week 2, Post Mission